Friday, 23 January 2015

empty pages // short story



"It's okay, to let go. It's like throwing away the pages of a really good book".

I stared at him.

"How?"

I was always wondered what it would be like to loose someone. Wondered, yet never wished. Would the pain be sharp like a needle or a dull ache that never goes away? Emptiness drained by tears? Yet I felt nothing. I didn't cry or mourn or laugh at memories or scream or curl away. I went to the funeral and sat at the front turning the whimpers in to an orchestra in my brain. 

I figured I was evil: unable to feel human pain or understand compassion. Robotic even, programmed to ignore. I had a diary, a laptop, a therapist. Pointless. I did my exams and got good grades, I went on holiday and sunbathed and smiled and laughed. Then I came back.

He looked just like Him when he approached me. Same eyes and nose and warmth, but not Him. All at once the pain came crashing down, compressing me, drowning me. I clutched the desk and let my books fall as the tears unified in anger down my cheeks. 

"It's okay", he said standing close but not too close.

I allowed the tears to fall on my top and dampen my neck. 

"It's okay, to let go. It's like throwing away the pages of a really good book."

I stared at him.

"How?"

"You can't keep a book forever. You have the memories and the enjoyment, yet one day, someday you'll have to throw the pages away. The pages contain the memories but do not trap them. The words lift of the page, so really all you're throwing away is an empty shell. And that's okay. "


This photo was just to thought provoking to not write a story about it. Admittedly, this story is kind of  sad. Although,at the same time, kind of happy. Take what you wish from this ten minute musing but remember this, we all write our own books. And sometimes it is okay to throw away the chapters.

Thank you for reading :)

-J

this photo was taken from my tumblr 


10 comments:

  1. This is such a lovely photo and story. You should defensively write some more

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  2. This was NOT what I was expecting when I clicked on this post!! O_o
    Really well written! Thanks for mixing that bit of hope in with the devastation.

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  3. really good! I truly enjoyed this!

    http://shecouldbeajoanofarc.blogspot.fr/

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  4. This story really touched me.... especially the bit about feeling robotic That's how I feel quite often when it comes to sadness, so it was just nice to see it expressed in someone else's words x
    You are a brilliant writer, and that photo is lovely! Did you take it yourself? I've always wanted to do that! x

    Extraneous Melodies by Emily Bee

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  5. wow this is so magical and emotional! I love your writing as you know, can't wait for the next story Jessie! x
    http://www.catchingdreamsblog.blogspot.co.uk

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  6. I always come back to read this piece, it's honestly so touching and beautiful. Your blog, Instagram and tumblr never fail to inspire and calm me. You're so talented X

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  7. I always come back to read this piece, it's touching and beautiful. Your tumblr, Instagram and blog never fail to inspire and calm me. You're so talented! X

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